Q: I was born male, but after many years of confusion, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m actually a transgender woman and I’m now seeking sex-reassignment surgery. As a Buddhist, I feel conflicted by the teachings on no-self and this unshakable feeling that there is a deep, hidden truth about me that I need to express. Am I wrong to embrace this sense of true self? Sallie [...]
About Narayan Helen Liebenson
How does a meditator deal with episodes of major depression?
Question: How does a meditator deal with episodes of major depression? Narayan Helen Liebenson: Major depression is one of the more difficult situations one can encounter. My experience is that meditation can be beneficial, if practiced under the supervision of a skilled therapist or teacher. I recommend The Mindful Way through Depression by Mark Williams, John Teasdale, [...]
Do Buddhas think?
Question: Do buddhas think? Narayan Helen Liebenson: As I understand it, the awakened mind includes thinking; it’s just that the thinking is necessary, functional, and discerning rather than indulgent, unnecessary, and addictive. Without attachment to thinking, silence and peace are available. In not grasping after thoughts and taking them to be me and mine, there is freedom [...]
Is enlightenment off-limits to laypeople?
Question: I recently attended a dharma talk in which the teacher said that laypeople, even if they practice sincerely, just don’t have the proper causes and conditions for full enlightenment. I feel that I need to know if this is true or not. What possibilities does this practice hold for me as a layperson? And what is beyond my reach? Please tell me honestly. Narayan Helen [...]
Listening to Auschwitz
Narayan Helen Liebenson reports on Zen Peacemakers' 20th annual bearing witness retreat at Auschwitz-Birkenau, and contemplates the lessons of compassion we are slow to learn, despite their everlasting importance. A few weeks ago, my older sister and I attended the Zen Peacemakers annual retreat in Auschwitz. It is a retreat that began 20 years ago and this year was attended [...]
Ask the Teachers: Am I doing myself a disservice by practicing Buddhism without a guru?
Question: My teacher died twenty-two years ago. Since then I have maintained my connection to the sangha and still practice in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition. But that’s only two of the three jewels. Am I doing myself and the tradition a disservice by trying to practice Buddhism without a guru? Would I be better off opting for another practice—perhaps secular mindfulness—that I [...]
Ask the Teachers: How do I share the dharma with my kids?
Question: I have two sons, one seven and the other fourteen. I’d like to introduce them to meditation and the Buddhist teachings but it’s difficult to compete with Nintendo games, favorite television shows, and all the other exciting and flashy things kids gravitate to these days. How can I share the gift of dharma with my sons without trying to force it on them and potentially [...]
Ask the Teachers: I live far from my Sangha, should I practice with a different one?
Question: I am a Zen Buddhist practitioner and I live many states away from the order with which I practice, so most of the time I practice alone even though there is a large community of Tibetan Buddhists and teachers nearby. I feel an affinity with Zen Buddhism, and I wonder about that attachment. Am I missing something by not opening myself to the teachings of those where I [...]
Ask the Teachers: Why do so many buddhists eat meat and wear fur?
Question: Why is the cruel treatment of animals almost never discussed or questioned within Buddhist circles or Buddhist magazines? So many Buddhists continue eating meat and wearing leather and fur. I don’t understand this. What is your view, and how can we who live by the dharma bring about a change? Zenkei Blanche Hartman: My view is that we are most effective in [...]
Ask the Teachers: Will Marriage Get in the Way of My Practice?
Question: I’m considering getting married but I’m concerned about how this might conflict with my practice (she is not a Buddhist). How can you come to terms with attachment and ultimately renounce it, AND be married? I’m confused. Please help if you can. Narayan Helen Liebenson: If you were to choose not to get married, do you think that would do away with the question of [...]