
When Goodwill is Better than Love: The Meaning of “Metta.”
“Loving-kindness” is a common translation of the Pali word “metta.” But what if metta and lovingkindness are not quite the same?
Illustrations by Tomi Um
Metta meditation, or loving-kindness meditation, is a Buddhist practice for cultivating compassion for ourselves and others through directing loving, friendly phrases and goodwill. The word “metta” is a Pali word, most often translated as loving-kindness, but has also been translated as universal goodwill or loving-friendliness. The practice originates from the historical Buddha’s early discourse on immeasurable friendliness, the Metta Sutta.
Metta is a concentration and mindfulness practice that invites the practitioner into a more loving, connected state of mind. This loving-kindness practice can be practiced anywhere, anytime, be it on a meditation cushion, driving in traffic, or walking down a busy street.
“In metta, we work to develop feelings of ease and love as boundless as the oceans that nourish and sustain our world,” writes Buddhist teacher Josh Korda. It’s a big challenge with a bigger reward. The results of metta can change how we see ourselves, in turn changing how we see the world.
Through metta, we become more honest and loving toward ourselves and the world around us. In metta meditation, we wish happiness, safety, and ease toward ourselves and others. In the most common version of metta practice, we offer these feelings of goodwill through the use of simple phrases first to ourselves, and in succession to someone we love, someone we’re indifferent towards, someone we consider a “difficult person,” and finally to all beings, everywhere. This allows us to begin our loving-kindness practice with feelings most accessible to us, and work up to more difficult feelings, such as sending love to someone you have a negative relationship with.
Some examples of the phrases you might use in metta practice are:
At first, some people might find the practice of metta too mushy or sentimental, or struggle to feel the connection metta promises. Others might struggle to direct loving feelings toward someone they consider a difficult person. As Buddhist teacher Melvin Escobar writes in his teaching on metta meditation, the practice of metta can be compared to lifting weights: If we begin with a weight that’s too heavy for us, we might end up hurt, or give up. “Likewise,” writes Escobar, “we can harm ourselves by trying to practice metta with a very difficult person [in mind], if we haven’t developed the capacity to work with the aversion and despair that may arise.”
Therefore, we begin the practice of metta incrementally, starting with ourselves, a being we consider beloved — such as a mentor, child, or pet — and when we’re ready, we work up to a more difficult person. With practice, the benefits of metta can be transformative.
May I be safe
May I be healthy
May I be happy
May I be at ease
May I be filled with loving-kindness
May I be peaceful
May I be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be at ease
May you be filled with loving-kindness
May you be peaceful
May all beings be safe
May they be healthy
May they be happy
May they be at ease
May they be filled with loving-kindness
May all beings be peaceful
In this video from the Lion’s Roar online learning course “How to Cultivate a Loving Heart: The Buddhist Practice of Metta,” Joanna Hardy shares a metta practice directed at yourself. You can use this video on its own, or as a starting point to start working with metta meditation.
“Loving-kindness” is a common translation of the Pali word “metta.” But what if metta and lovingkindness are not quite the same?
Janice Lynne Lundy shares her perspective on the practice of loving-kindness – why she loves it, and why it goes with her everywhere.
When I first learned about loving-kindness or Metta practice, I thought it was a little weird.
Buddhist monk Ajahn Brahm shares his personal approach to loving-kindness meditation, also known as metta.
Melvin Escobar teaches metta, a concentration practice to cultivate unconditional goodwill for all. In precarious times like these, it’s a way to listen to our hearts.
Janice Lynne Lundy shares her perspective on the practice of loving-kindness – why she loves it, and why it goes with her everywhere.
When I first learned about loving-kindness or Metta practice, I thought it was a little weird.
Buddhist monk Ajahn Brahm shares his personal approach to loving-kindness meditation, also known as metta.
You’re never too young to practice loving-kindness. Gail Silver on how to teach metta to your kids.
Zen priest Liên Shutt teaches a short meditation to foster compassion for beings in search of refuge.
Mushim Patricia Ikeda teaches us how to generate loving-kindness and good will as an antidote to hatred and fear.
Mushim Patricia Ikeda teaches us how to generate loving-kindness and good will as an antidote to hatred and fear.
You’re never too young to practice loving-kindness. Gail Silver on how to teach metta to your kids.
Zen priest Liên Shutt teaches a short meditation to foster compassion for beings in search of refuge.
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